Friday, November 26, 2010
I typed this whole message out and it wouldnt take for some reason and when I tried to "go back" it deleted! I poured my guts out:) well instead of typing everything again ...I will sum it up... Im in Georgia now visiting all my husbands family..been on the road since Wed morning..iv been eating like CRAP..this southern cooking & baking is NO JOKE!! his one aunt baked 23 cakes&pies alone...from scratch...WHO DOES THAT?..LOL...UGH..not to mention my hotel is right beside a Hooters which is my favorite wing place in the world big boobies dont keep me away and my husband doesnt have a problem with going with me either ( amazing huh?) how many of you can say your husband would suffer through hooters with you 2x in 3 days?..LOL. Im freaking because I have my fill on Tuesday and am scared I have gained back the 6lbs I worked so hard to lose in the past 6 weeks! I would hate to go in there and only show losing a pound or something crazy...Im just gonna fess up and tell them the truth about the week. I even made sure to book a hotel with an indoor pool and workout room, but do you think I used it ?? even once?? hell no I didn't so much as put my sports bra on...Iv decided im gonna starve myself for the next 3 days in order to get back to what I was before I left for this God forsaken southern state:) I know thats not a good thing to do but Im feeling desperate right now...I actually WANT to go back to the gym when I get back home....I cannot wait...I want to feel that way again that feeling when you just feel really good about yourself....Iv been having that when I do what I need to do and stick to the plan and I am finding the only way I do that is to stay on a schedule..any slight schedule change, party, traveling just throws me off...and when Im off I am REALLY OFF...I just remmeber the first time I went to a nutritionist the first few months while waiting for surgery..after talking to her all but 5 minutes she said I will tell you the type of dieter/eater you are..."you have yo yo dieted all of your adult life, you are either on a diet and when your on it you are on it to a tee..but when your off of it you are REALLY OFF.. no inbetween" and this has stuck with me cause even though its not rocket science its exactly how I am...if I go off I just say "f*ck it" and eat whatever I want for days...than Im back on and back on to a tee. Than she proceeded to tell me that will never work with the band. When I think back to that it scares me cause sometimes I feel myself slipping back into my old ways again and I dont want to.