Sunday, November 7, 2010
Good Bye 260's!!
I am so happy...I finally got out of the 260's! I weighed myself and I am 259 lbs!! to reward myself I did a little shopping today...bought 3 pairs of jeans, size 18!! woot woot!! I did a body pump challenge Saturday morning and I sweat like crazy..I think I sweated out of the 260's. Anyway, I can finally see the weight loss in my clothes, in my face and in the mirror. Im not close to where I want to be but I finally feel like Im gettin somewhere. I am having more people notice as well. I have so much to lose total, 120lbs, that 40lbs seems like a drop in the bucket but if you really think about it 40lbs??? that is 8 bags of flour!! 41lbs is the most I have ever lost dieting in the past 15 years so I am about to exceed that and that is a pretty big goal to me. it took 40lbs to finally feel like Im accomplishing something. Its actually a little scary..cause Im scared of failing and Im scared of success, Im scared that If I do lose 100lbs..will I be able to keep it off? Will I eventually gain it all back like Iv always done when I dieted in the past? Will something happen to the band eventually? I dont have the money to do this all over again! What about if I do lose this weight? will I be a different person? how will I look? Its enough to stress you out...lol..Im not one to take compliments very well and I feel a little "concieted" if someone tells me how good I look and I just say thanks. I feel like I always have to down the compliment...I don't know if that makes sense or not but compliments just make me feel uncomfortable sometimes. Anyway, today is a good day..I just wish I had a little more restriction to help me out! but for now Im happy.