Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Hey everyone...sorry I havn't posted in a while..I just really havnt had any great news or new info and been kinda busy. I basically have been just chuggin along...Havn't really lost anymore weight..I have managed to stay in the 240's this past week but the scale is teetering between 245 -248...it changes weekly. Iv beeen having a tough time trying to figure out if I should get another fill or not. I moved my appointment up to March 1st about 4 weeks sooner than scheduled because I am having such a hard time losing weight now. I can tell I am at my 6 month marker because just like when I dieted pre-band I am starting to struggle mentally and strugglin with getting to the gym. I just dont feel like going..I am making myself go still but I find that I start skipping here and there plus I am not sticking to my eating and the band rules in the past couple weeks. I still can eat a good bit of food about 2 cups at a meal. I am still getting stuck and find myself leaning toward "easier" foods because im tired of that feeling. I actually got pretty sick tonight and vomited for the 2nd time since having surgery. this was pretty bad though not like the first time. I didnt think I was going to stop...very weird. I am pretty sure its because I was eating too fast and eating more than I should. I am still learning how to eat and you would think after 6 months I would begin to have this down..but its a constant battle with my mind and my old habits, habits I just can't seem to break.....the fast eating, big bites...eating crap I shouldnt...eating after Im full...UGH!! I realize now more than ever that this is such a mind thing for me and that even having the surgery doesnt change who I am and how I deal with food!! I know I won't quit or give up but its such a an up and down ride! one week Im on point and the next Im hitting a downward spriral! I am going to talk to the dr. on Monday and hopefully he can help make the decision if he feels I need a fill or if I just need to change my habits and get back in the game! I will keep you all posted!!